YuGiOh's Funniest Home Videos
by joeywillcat1011
Summary: Videos of the gang, and some crude language in it. (Major Tea bashing, and some Kaiba bashing.) YOU WILL HAVE TO READ OTHER CHAP. TO KNOW WHAT YOU ARE VOTING FOR.
1. Chapter 1

Yu-Gi-Oh's! Funniest Home Videos

(//video//)  Note:  I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh! Or America's Funniest Home Videos.

Willcat1011-  Welcome to Yu-Gi-Oh's! Funniest Home Videos!  I am your host.  One thing crosses my mind… Why do you park in a driveway, and drive on a parkway?  **Sigh**.  There are things I will never be good at-telling jokes.  So, lets leave that to the audience!  Joey submits our first video.  (Puts in tape.)

//How Tristen Got His Hair//

Yami- You'll look great Tristen, promise.

Tea-  Yeah!  Have faith in Yami!  I know I do.  (Puppy dog eyes.)(Yami shudders.)

Tristen-  Noooooooo!  If Tea thinks it's good, that must mean it looks hideous!  (Joey is laughing uncontrollably on the ground…  Explaining the rotating images.)

//(End Video.)//

Willcat1011-  Tea, what an idiot with all those sucky friendshit speeches.  Ah, I love my job!  Oh!  We are on the air?  Oops!  Our next submission is from Yami Yugi.

(Puts in the next video.)

//How Tea Started Her Friendship Speeches//

Tristen-  You're so short sometimes, Yugi.

Yugi-  Who are you calling short, pointy freak!  (Kicks him in the no-no area.)

(Joey passes by, and then falls on the ground, laughing hysterically again.  [A/N-Starting to see some patterns forming.])

(Tea also comes by.)

Tea (in her mind)-  Why don't I find this amusing anymore?  Ah!  An idea struck me!  I am starting to have a heart.  What should I call my new feelings?  I've got it!  I can call it a friendship speech.  Perfect!  (Now out loud.)  Hey guys!  Why are you being so aggressive?  Calm down, and manage your anger.  Everything will be okay.  So now we can all be friends again!

Tristen and Yugi in unison(with an evil grin amoungst themselves)-  Okay!  (Turn and kick Tea in the shin.)  MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Yami-  Hey!  What did you do that for?  (Gives death glare.)

//(End Tape.)//

Audience and Willcat1011-  YEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!  (Whistle and cheer tremendously.)

Willcat1011-  Thus proving why I love my job!  Our next video comes from… Oh boy!  Tea.  (Everyone groans loudly.)

(Puts in Video.)

//Dating//

Miho-  Bakura, wait up!  Here is your twenty dollars for being an image boyfriend… Maybe now my popularity will rise after that plunge from becoming Tristen's girlfriend.

Bakura-  No problem… but I do want to get to know you better.  (Winks.)(Miho blushes.)

Tea-  Tristen won't like this.  I think I will have to give Miho and Bakura a friendship speech.  (Goes up to them.)  That wasn't a very nice thing you did, Miho.  Tristen will be heartbroken… He really loved you, you know.  And Bakura!  What possessed you to do such a thing?

Bakura-  Actually, my Yami did.  

//(End Video.)//

Willcat1011-  Um… _Interesting.  _Well then.  Lets get to our next video sent in by Mokuba.

(Slips in the tape.)

//Kaiba's True Passion//

(In the foreground you can see and hear Kaiba chanting the Mucha Lucha theme song.)

Kaiba-  Mucha lucha. Mucha-Lucha, It's the way of life!  (Flexing his muscles in a skin tight, pink wrestling outfit.)  What mischief will Ricochet and the gang get into now?  **Gasp**!  The Flea has a pet fish named Sr. Fishy Fish that he flushed down the toilet accidentally years ago… and now he is in an aquarium, creating massive havoc on The Flea for doing something he didn't mean to do!  What a predicament!  That fish makes me want to…grrr.  (Picks up the 35 inch, surround sound television, and chucks it out the window.)

Mokuba-  As you can see, Seto is obsessed with Mucha Lucha, and tries to use the cartoon as a stress reliever.  We go through about thirteen TV's a week.  (Shouts to Kaiba.)  Not again, Seto!  You can at least throw the computer out the window instead… we have more of those!

//(End of Tape.)//

Willcat1011-  Whoah!  Look at that brute strength!  Now I _FEAR _Kaiba even more!  Now it's time for the audience to get involved.  All you do is review and tell what video will win $10,000, and bragging rights!  He he!  I stole that money from Kaiba when he was watching Mucha Lucha!


	2. Chapter 2

Yu-Gi-Oh's! Funniest Home Videos

(//video//)  Note:  I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh!, America's Funniest Home Videos, Mucha Lucha, or Spongebob Squarepants.

Willcat1011-  Why do people call the antennae above a television, bunny ears?  I mean, cats are the ones always perched on top.  Am I right?  People?  Tough crowd today…Uh.  Fine!  I'll do what I'm paid to do, happy? 

Audience-  Yeah!  Money!  (Starts cheering madly.)

(Puts in Tape submitted by Kaiba.)(Hear and see Mucha Lucha.)

Kaiba-  Oops!  Wrong tape!  (Blushing madly.)  Here!  (Gives Willcat1011 the real video.)

//Fire Drill//

(Yami Yugi's hair is on fire.) 

Yami-  Dude!  I thought this hair gel wasn't flammable!  (Madly screaming-  Fire, fire!  Help me I am on FIRE!  [Starts running possessively in a huge circle.])

(Tea comes by.)

Tea-  Hoh no!  Yami, don't worry!  I am here to save you!  (Goes up to Yami, and catches on fire herself.)

Yami-  Why did you do that?  Now you're on fire, too!  We're going to die!

Tea-  Don't worry!  The power of friend…

Yami-  Shut up, shut up, shut up!  That friendship crap isn't made of water you know!

(Kaiba rolling on ground in hysterics, trying to gain composure to steady the camara.)

Yami-  At least I don't watch Mucha Lucha, Sr. Grudgy Grude.

//(End Tape.)//

Willcat1011-  Wow!  That must not have been long ago, because Kaiba is still obsessed with Mucha Lucha, and Tea is as bald as a cue ball.  (Audience turns to stare at the eighth wonder of the world.)  So shiny and bald… It's like an egg.  (Starts to drool.)  Eeegggggggssssss!  (A crewmember behind stage snaps finger to hurry up.)  Huh?  Oh yeah, the next submission is from Mai.

(Slips in Video.)

//Cancellations//

(Mai is tiptoeing through Kaiba's office.)

Kaiba-  WWHHHHAAAATTTT!?!  MUCHA LUCHA IS GOING TO CANCEL AIRINGS?  This can't be!  ARGH!  (Picks up computer and chucks it out the window.  You can hear a sound of a bomb hitting the ground, and a loud groin from an old man.)  No!  My Buena Girl, how could you?  I loved you!  And Flea, if I was gay I wouldn't go for you, I'd go for Ricochet.  His body is soooo… never mind.  (Curls into a ball, and starts sucking his thumb.  At the same time, biting his nails.)

Mokuba-  Not again!  You've been looking at the wrong Internet site again.  It was the Spongebob Squarepants site. (A/N-  Sorry people, but I heard that new episodes are canceled for at least a while because the two directors, or peoples' in charge, are fighting over something.  And another "idea" that some little girl jumped of a boat and drowned searching for Bikini Bottom, is going around.)

Mai-  Kaiba!  What possessed you to throw such a valuable computer out the window?

Kaiba-  What are _you_ doing here?  Go away, and buy stuff!  Can't you see I am in self-denial?  (Throw's her a one-thousand dollar bill.)

//(End.)//

Willcat1011-  Um… Kaiba, you need serious help.  Here!  Take this card of my psychiatrist's name.  (Hands him card.)  Okay, are next video is sent in from Duke Devlin.

(Puts in Tape.)

//Le Meal Special//

(Joey is cooking _something_ in Home Economics class.  Tea being the tester.)

Joey-  Here you go!  I call it:  Chocolate and Macaroni Cheese Soup. (Hands her his creation.)(Tea takes a sip.)

Tea-  Joey!  This is sooooo disgusting!  How dare you put something so hideous on Earth?  (Puts hand to mouth in realization of her comment.)

Joey-  Tea, you really hated it?  Perfect!  Here Mrs. Chef Lady Teacher Person!  

Mrs. Chef Lady Teacher Person-  Joey, how dare you make something so… (Joey hides his face.) Good!  I declare this the school lunch for today.  I'll get the Soup Ladies to fix some of this up.

(Later at lunch.)

Tea-  Blech!  (Picks up the Chocolate and Macaroni Cheese Soup, and hurls it towards Duke.  The camera is hidden beneath the soup.)

//(End//

Willcat1011-  Mmmmmmm… Soup!  Chocolate!  Macaroni!  All the things a _starving, deprived of lunch- time, host _could want.  (Shoots death glare at the Crew.)  Now!  You know the drill!  Just vote for your favorite videos from this show and the past, and maybe it could win the $10,000 prize.  Courtesy of Kaiba!

Audience-  Money!  Yey!  From Kaiba!  Yey!


	3. Chapter 3

Yu-Gi-Oh's! Funniest Home Videos

(//video//)  Note:  I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh! Or America's Funniest Home Videos.

Willcat1011 (Hand covering mouth, whispering to crew members.)- Can't I skip the stinking jokes this time?  (Crewmembers shake their heads.  Now out loud.)  Okay folks, we're back with more videos.  One more thing that's crossed my mind lately concerns cats.  What if they could live in the water, and then what would they be called?  Catfish!  

Audience- Um…

Willcat1011 to crew- See!  That's what my jokes get!  Lousy ratings, and they are your entire fault!  Okay folks, our first video is from Serenity.

(Puts in Tape.)

//Hospital Life//

Serenity- Hi everybody watching this tape!  I thought I would make a tape on my life at the hospital.  (Walks up to an old man with a prune-like face.  Probably in his 90's.)  Hello Mr. Parks!

Mr. Parks- Uhhh, my arthritis is killing me.  Do you know where the ice cream cart is?

Serenity- Um… no sir.

Mr. Parks- YOU DON'T!  YOU MUST HAVE STOLEN IT!  GIVE IT TO ME!

Serenity- Mr. Parks, please calm down, you will raise your blood pressure.  It's already too high.

Mr. Parks- ICE CREAM!  NOW!

Serenity- Sir, please.

Mr. Parks- GIVE ME MY IC… (Drops on floor.)

Serenity- Oh dear God, no!

Nurse- Out of the way dear!  (Takes pulse.)  Tsk, tsk, tsk.  What did he do, honey?

Serenity- He wanted to find the ice cream cart, ma'am.

Nurse-*Sigh*.  That is the fourth one this week.

//(End Tape.)//

Willcat1011- I don't think I want to ever go there, or at least that hospital.  Now, our next entry is from Weevil.

(Slips in Video.)

//Metamorphosis//

Weevil- Watch in awe as the caterpillar climbs into its cocoon.  (Hairy caterpillar thingy climbs into its green cocoon.)(45 minutes later, in real time, it finishes getting in.)  Isn't it amazing?  Now we shall see the process of its life in the cocoon, up until it gets out, and turns into a lovely (killer) butterfly.  (2 weeks later, still in real time, it is about to come out.)  **Gasp**!  It's coming!  Here it is!  (Out comes a moth, not a butterfly.)  Oh well, it wasn't a butterfly, but the process is still amazing.  (A/N- I don't know exactly how the metamorphosis happens, so don't complain.)

//(End Tape.)//

Willcat1011- You bleapin' idiot!  That took so damn long, and now you've pissed me off!  Guards get him out of here, and Weevil…

Weevil- Yes?

Willcat1011- Your video is still a valid entry, but you are not allowed in this studio or this campus anymore!  So let the guards carry your sorry butt out of here, and may you never return!  Sorry for the interruption people.  Our next submission is from Bakura last year.

(Put in Tape.)

//The Other Side of Dark//  (Name of a book that I also do not own because of copyright laws.)

Bakura- Once I went exploring in my Yami's mind chamber and I found some nifty little secrets.  I will lead you through my Yami's mind chamber now.  (Screen turns dark, but then gradually turns light so you can see… pink?)  Through door number one you will see many images of a white fluffy bunny named Pooky.  That was his pet many of thousands of years ago in ancient Egypt.  He died, thus leaving my Yami all alone.  You will see that in door number two, Yami Yugi is holding a gun, about to shoot…

Yami Yugi image- You know to much now my friend, or should I say ex-friend.  (Takes aim off Pooky, and turns it toward Bakura.)  Say good-bye!  (Pulls trigger on Bakura.)  MWAHAHAHAHA!  (Camera falls with Bakura to the ground, and lies in a pool of blood.)

//(End of Tape.)//

Willcat1011- Oh my lord!  That's why it was sent in last year, and explains why Bakura can't be with us today!  

Yami Bakura- That's what happened!  Yami Yugi said he was run over by a 4by4.  That is it!  I can't take this shit!  He's going to die… right after I perform a proper burial for Pooky…  It's payback time!  (Chases Y. Yugi out the door, and you can hear shouting, curses, and screams.)

Willcat1011- Now is the time to vote for your favorite video by reviewing!  The winner receives a $10,000 prize courtesy of Kaiba!

Audience- $10,000 courtesy of Kaiba!  Yay! 

Willcat1011- Let me remind you of the videos:  How Tristen Got His Hair (From Joey.), How Tea Started Her Friendship Speeches (By Yami Yugi.), Dating (From Tea.), Kaiba's True Passion (Sent in from Mokuba.), Fire Drill (From Kaiba.), Cancellations (From Mai.), Le Meal Special (From Duke Devlin.), Hospital Life (From Serenity.), Metamorphosis (From Weevil.), and The Other Side of Dark (From our departed Bakura.).

(A/N- The stories you don't recognize are from previous chapters.  REVIEW WITH YOUR FAVORITE VIDEO CHOICE.)

Willcat1011- Oh yeah, and I forgot to mention one thing!  Second place is $5,000 courtesy of Yami Yugi for shooting Bakura.  Third place is $2,500 courtesy of Weevil for putting us through the "Exile of Two Weeks."  

Audience- Yami Yugi's money!  Yay!  Weevil's money?  Eeeewwwwww!


End file.
